from light to dark

i am happy to report that the loss of carbs and the additional five minutes of cardio seem to be doing the trick. the scale has finally started to nudge its way to the left and further i needed almost a 1/2 inch less tape to make it around my mid-section.

if things continue as they are i probably won't need to make any further adjustments. it is still early so i am not ruling out a last week 'kick'. nothing too crazy, maybe something as simple as adding another five minutes of cardio. again, i should reiterate that i am still off-season but just want to drop enough bodyfat to 'see' the muscles that i have been trying to build. there is no need nor is it particularily healthy to aim for stage definition.

there have been no further developments of note on the writing front... much to my immediate displeasure. i should have nothing but opportunity during my upcoming vacation. it is likely that natalie will be working while i am there and i will have to fill my days somehow. last i heard she had yet to replace her computer after the break-in.

the thought of being away from the internet for eleven days does actually fill me with a sense of abject terror. dear god i might actually be forced to speak to someone!!!

now onto the dark.

a little over a week ago i spent the morning in a church saying good-bye to uncle noel. after a long and difficult battle with alzheimers we laid him to rest.

i have mentioned in here time and time again that i am not known for making a lot of family events but this is one that i did not miss. in fact during the post-service gathering my father was moved to remark how he was amazed that i was still there.

the reason i mentioned my uncle's passing is to discuss the funeral service. i have never recognized organized religion to be anything more than a cash grab and i honestly fail to see the validity of the funeral service. i sat there and listened to the pastor speak, the soloist warble and i watched the alter boys fight to stay awake when they weren't 'leaping' into action. as near as i could tell, nothing that was said or done that day seemed to make my aunt and cousin's grief any less.

at one point with all the standing and sitting, i sort of wished i had some weights to take advantage of the squatting opportunity. blaspheme much? well yeah... burn baby, burn.

the longer the service lasted the more convinced i was that i don't want a service held to celebrate my passing. although i could easily see how some folks might be moved to party on such an occasion. just toss my carcass into the furnace and call it a day.

what would make me happy, assuming i would still give a damn since i will probably be twisting in a sea of flames; i'd rather everyone just spend a couple hours doing something that brought them joy. hell... they don't even need to do it together. my brothers both enjoy golfing. i have no use for the game but i'd rather instead of spending a couple hours in a church trying to look sullen and miserable that they hit the links.

on one hand i find it kind of odd that i am contemplating my passing already but as time goes by i really only getting closer to the finish line and further and further away from the starting blocks.

as they say in la belle province... c'est la vie.