body by slinky??

It's Slinky
It's Slinky
For fun it's a wonderful toy
It's fun for a girl or a boy
It's fun for a girl or a boy

it was back day and i was at the gym loading my bar between sets of deadlifts when suddenly, out of the corner of my eye i saw a female gym member. the woman in question appeared to be crawling along the gym floor.

the crawl to the locker room is something you would expect to see from someone who have done one hell of a leg workout. someone who has left it all on the gym floor and has no other method of forward momentum than by dragging their lifeless carcass along the floor.

this woman however was crawling on purpose. she started off in a plank with her socked feet hooked behind the lip of a 35 lb. plate. she would then drag the plate under her hips, from there she would walk forward until she was back in a plank position before repeating the drag. she covered a fair bit of the gym this way and i have to admit i had to stop what i was doing to watch in disbelief.

i do understand that a lot of folks have lost interest in traditional training methods and are drawn to crossfit and boot camp training styles. i would like to respectfully mention that they do have gyms that specialize in and are set up for those training styles. dragging yourself along the floor in a traditional gym turns you into a hazard. if i had stepped back for any reason i would have tripped over her. which more than likely would have had me knocking myself out on the sled press machine behind me.

the slinky lady comes to the gym with her gear-head boyfriend who is responsible for things she does on the gym floor. he sometimes comes to our gym wearing a t-shirt with personal trainer emblazoned on the back. i have to tell you nothing scares me more than watching him train when he has that shirt on.

i am convinced the boyfriend is a few fries short of a happy meal. that or mommy didn't play with him enough. he isn't happy unless he is training in the most obnoxious manner of all. we are talking about needlessly slamming the weights and screaming as if he was being castrated sans anesthetic on the gym floor. i know that he does it all simply for the attention because if you watch him you will see him toss himself to the floor lay there for a few seconds then pop his head up to see if anyone is looking before crumpling back onto the floor. almost as though he is suffering from an attack of the vapours the likes of which any plantation era southern belle would envy.

later while i was attempting to pick up a 45 lb. plate that some jug head had left on the floor not even six scant inches away from the hook it should have been hung from. 45's can be tricky to pick up if the plate doesn't have a natural lip, you sort of need to use your feet to nudge the plate up enough to get your fingers under it, preferably without crushing your fingers. which can happen as sometimes the damn plate will slip before you have established a firm hold.

there wasn't a lot of space between the plate loaded machine i was using and the delt machine beside it. if i am between the two machines struggling with a full plate that takes up a good portion of available space. suddenly there is sara slinky and she is powering her way through the tiny gap. just then a little pink thing goes sailing through the air. it seems her headphone wire caught on the handle of the machine and was ripped from her head.

i had to laugh.

now i can't say for certain that girlfriend was trying to intimidate me but if she was... somebody should tell little precious that i am the last person she mess around with.

it took quite a bit of searching but i finally found a youtube video of the exercise. notice the lack of people, equipment, weights and the like in the area where the exercise is performed.