stickin' my head in the sand

i don't frequently read the newspaper but while for the microwave i flipped one open. the first headline i read was something about the biebs showing his ass. how is this news? the little #@%$ is so pale and scrawny how can you even tell if he's ass-out?

we live in a society that is full of  'apps,' some that will locate your favourite coffee establishments, some that track local traffic, some that connect directly to social media sites and take the challenge out of stalking... frankly the list is endless. well i have proposed the development of an app before and i am convinced now more than ever that there needs to be an app through which one could edit their news feeds.

i would happily exist in a world where i would not hear news of: either justin, gaga, any jersey shore cast mate, chris brown, rihanna, kanye and tiger woods and that is just a quick few off the top of my head. i am sure you have a list of your own. now i understand that although i think anything those people do or say is of no value whatsoever, i do recognize that there are people out there who do not share my opinion. they might even be glued to the news media in order to learn such vital bits of information as what ply t.p. the biebs likes to use to wipe his ass. in order to gather the answers to these and other questions of 'interest' the need for mercenary paparazzi remains. those 'wonderful' group of individuals willing to dive into the roadway in order to grab that all important shot of yet another hollywood starlet who can neither keep their knees together nor their underwear on.

i just think the world would be a better place if we could direct 'news' to the people who'd most appreciate it. so in my world the t.p. ply news story, for example, would hit the news wire and immediately be shared worldwide but before being displayed on my computer any 'news' dealing with the biebs would instantly be deleted. thus my new experience is far more pleasant one. as well i can perhaps hang on to a few more i.q. points. trust me when i tell you i am not in the position to risk losing anymore.

will somebody write the ostrich app please?